“Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

I am really bummed right now. Really, really, really bummed. It is currently a time called “pilot season” in the film and T.V. industry. It is when they cast and film the pilots to new T.V. shows or seasons. Then they show then to the producers or executives to see if the show will stick so they can keep filming, usually an episode a week. My point is that right now, I should be going on many, many auditions. But as far as I know, I don’t have a single one on the line up. This sucks! Maybe it’s for a good reason I just don’t know. That’s what I am really hoping.

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About a week ago, I auditioned for a student film at the community college I go to. I was leaving acting class and I passed by the recording studio and saw my friend whom I know from the crew at Modesto Performing Arts. He was in charge of auditions for a film or short and wanted me to audition. I will pretty much audition for anything I can get my hands on if I don’t have an audience. It was just me and him and a camera. It doesn’t hurt to audition and try. What’s the worst that can happen? They say no. Well, you have a  no if you don’t audition. The best thing is they give you a role or, even better, write you a role. So I auditioned for a part and then he asked me to read a different role, because he has me in mind when he read through the script. That. Is. Awesome. I don’t care if I don’t get that part, or even a  part at all (Okay, I’m lying.), but just being though of as the right person for a specific role for anything means someone has confidence that I can portray a character and I am not forgotten as an actress (Even if it is my friend and it is a student film at a junior college). So, I should get a call in the next few weeks and it shoots over the first two months of summer.

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I was asked to do the fashion show at a college about an hour away, the same on this time last year. I still don’t have a date for the auditions yet. I guess that makes me nervous, only because I just like knowing these things when a person asks. I do have people from my acting class ask me if/when I have auditions and for what and where. I think it’s awesome.

Speaking of acting class, we are doing a story time where we have to talk about a time we were scared or frightened in our life. It’s to prepare us for a serious monologue, the next assignment. Most of the semester has been comical or only slightly serious. We’ve done the Shakespeare “Seven Ages of Man” and a 3 minute interactive scene with one other person, along with silly exercises. Most of the class went on Thursday with their story, but I haven’t gone yet. I’ll go on Tuesday and I have no idea what I am going to say. It got pretty emotional and there were some tears. Overall, my class is really good at telling stories. The ones that I’m thinking of aren’t long stories or hardly even a story. As I was listening to all these stories, I realized that, from the stories, fear/being scared is almost always present because you don’t know what’s going to happen next. What should you do, what should they do, are they going to live, am I going to live, go to jail, be alone. There were some really powerful stories told and you would never expect that person went through that.

My older sister did a project for one of her classes and she had to research diet myths and holy cow, I just about went vegan/raw diet. I still am in that I’ve stopped eating processed foods (mostly) and stopped dairy products (except for the few bites of chocolate ice cream a few nights ago). The thought of the diet change is everything I eat should be coming off God’s green Earth. Anything else is not good for you. Processed, chemicals, no. All your body needs is fruits, veggies, nuts, and meat.  Some may argue meat, but I think meat is acceptable, as long as there is no hormones and all that stuff than makes chickens twice as big, twice as fast. I haven’t been the best about my food choices, but it’s much better than before. The current food pyramid is so wrong. Fruits and veggies should make up like, 75% of your diet and the other 25% is proteins in nuts, beans, meat. Changing my diet, I’ve noticed my belly isn’t bloated and is flatter. I know, weird. It’s usually better in the morning and gets worse through the day. I’m working on it with exercise, though. Yoga twice a week. I’ve been eating lots of apples and oranges. Apples are on sale and we have an orange tree. Grapefruit is really good with a bit of sugar on it. (I think sugar is acceptable because it is natural. You just need to use it sparingly and in moderation.) I’ve been having longer shifts at work, so I usually make a peanut butter and strawberry or boysenberry preserve sandwich so I don’t have to buy Panda Express. However, PB and J sandwiches are also not healthy. Added sugar to all three products, and the bread is not in the diet thought.

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I updated my portfolio, but I haven’t put any on here yet. I’m happy with how they turned out, but not ecstatic. So, I am expecting a call for a student film, have an audition TBA, and am focusing on school.

I have some monologues picked out that I might record and post onto YouTube and on here. I’ve only recorded myself once and I’m not sure how I like it. I know I need to see what I look like, though. I have some short ones about 20 seconds to a minute and some longer ones about one to three minutes.  What do you think?

Oh, and today is my birthday. No longer a teenager. Now, I’m officially an adult, at 20. (Ew.)

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