“Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.” -Og Mandino

I thought I would do a week log of my workouts real quick: 

  • Monday: 2 1/2 hours of tennis (1200 calories burned)
  • Tuesday: 2 1/2 hours of tennis (670 calories burned)
  • Wednesday: 3 1/2 hours of tennis (1540 calories burned)
  • Thursday: 1 1/2 hours of tennis (660 calories burned)
  • Sunday: 30 minutes of paced walk, 5 minutes of jump rope (370 calories burned)

Plus I worked 2 4 hour shifts at work

  • Tuesday: 4 hour shift of work (720 calories burned)
  • Thursday: 4 hour shift of work (720 calories burned)

Total: 5880 calories burned 7 days.

That’s 3 days worth of food burned in 7 days.

I’ve been using  this site http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calories_burned.htm to calculate calories burned.

I was asked by someone if I would be their doubles partner in a competition on Friday. I don’t think I’m that good. I think I need more practice. A lot more. I was just having a good day when I went against him on singles. My parents say I should do it, but I don’t think I’m ready. I need to work on my serves. Really bad.

Last Wednesday, they guy I usually play against in doubles or play with, told me I looked pale and told me to sit down. He said I was dehydrated and I should be drinking 1 1/2 gallon of water a day. I sat for about 10 minutes and got up to play again against the wall. I know I am a bit dehydrated, but I drank 2 bottles of Gatorade that night alone when I played. Should be good enough, right? 😉


I don’t know if I’ve already said, but we finally had gotten the dates for the ball and the pageant. Well, the ball has been moved. They don’t know when yet. And that really makes me mad. I already put in my request off for that weekend. But, there’s nothing I can do about it. I asked for days off that I usually don’t work anyway.

I’ve been a bad girl and have been shopping. I’ve got most of my Christmas shopping done. But, I burned through all that I earned for the commercial I did. I don’t know how I did it. I can under stand how half of it went, but I don’t know how the other half got spent so fast. I need to watch my spending. I can’t let it disappear like that anymore. I have two checks waiting for me at work that I can pick up on Friday. I still have 3 hotel stays that I need to pay for. One of which might be only about $35, because I’ll be splitting the room cost with a friend of mine who is coming to Jordan’s graduation.


My mom put me in the running for a commercial that I really, really wanted. I don’t know why I didn’t get it. It was for a shoe commercial for athletic shoes. A 12 hour shoot, 8 pm to 8 am, tonight. They were looking for a 5’7″ brunette athlete girl who can run. Uhhhh. Fits me to a ‘T’. I’m 5’7″, a brunette, and I run. I was on a track team for 3 years. I play tennis. A lot. I didn’t get picked. Oh well. Maybe next time. Maybe next time will be my big break. Hopefully next time will be my big break. After all, they did come to me, twice (the commercial and the movie). I didn’t go to them.

Life seems a bit more unfair today.

Semper Fi.


“When a thing is done, it’s done. Don’t look back. Look forward to your next objective. -George C. Marshall

I kind of feel that’s how the pageant is going to be. I don’t want to look back at it because I don’t want to do pageants as a job. Yeah, it will be a good experience, hopefully, and there is a prize which would help so much with the family, financially. I think that’s the main reason I’m doing it. To win the cash prize. Is that a bad thing? There is a difference of doing something for the game and doing something for the glory.

I guess the quote can also apply to me playing tennis. I don’t think about the mistake you just id, move forward to the next point. Learn from it, but don’t dwell on it.

Tomorrow, I’m working 4 hours, and I am going to send in my request for Tuesday and Thursday off. Those are my main tennis days. I’m also asking Monday and Wednesday night off.  I could also ask Monday and Wednesday mornings off, but I don’t want to make myself practically unavailable 4 days a week.

I played 2 1/2 hours of intense tennis tonight. Holy cow, I am still so tired. I was shaking on the ride home. I hardly ever workout so hard that I shake. I have negative energy points left. It took me 2 hours to convince myself to take a rinse off shower. And then I was only in for, literally, less than a minute. I didn’t get my hair wet.


Exercise log for today

  • 2 1/2 hours of tennis- 1200 calories burned

Man, I played so hard! I still can’t believe it. I was actually having a really good tennis day. I won a full set of singles, 6-5, and won 2 full set of doubles, both 6-5. I say full games because we usually only play half sets, first to 3, but we played first to 6.

Tomorrow I have 1 1/2 hours of tennis and then work 4 hours. I’m not sure if I want to go running after work. I worked out hard today, but I haven’t run all weekend, since Thursday, and I have not been eating the best these past few days.


“All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.” -Spike Milligan

The title is about money because I went to an audition yesterday in Hollywood. I paid for the gas. I don’t think I should have paid for the gas. I don’t think anyone should have paid for the gas. It pisses me of that anyone had to pay for the gas. I’m not saying I should have gotten gas money for it, but the audition was such a joke, in my opinion, that I shouldn’t have gone. I drive 300 miles there for a joke audition, drive 300 miles back, and am exhausted during work the next day for nothing.

I got to the audition an hour early, and the audition was at a book store in Hollywood. We wandered around the store for an hour and then waited outside in a line. I was dressed in a cheetah print halter dress and gladiator style brown sandals. The info in the email said to dress the part. I did. I was audition for Jane, as in Tarzan and Jane. There were other girls there in workout clothes and no makeup and then there were girls, literally  in leopard print skimpy bikinis or mid drift shirts and mini skirts and 6 inch heels, and guys without shoes or shirts. And, I was one of the shortest girls there. Driving by, you would have thought we were auditioning for a jungle porno. Anyway, they called in 3 people at a time, and I was in the 3rd group. I was the second one to go in my group. We were to go up in front of a group of people, who were there for a book signing, and tell why in a bout 30 seconds why I would make a good Jane, or Tarzan for the guys. No joke, the girl before me stripped off all her clothes, on camera, to reveal a tiny leopard print bikini, a ten body, and was pretty in shape. How am I going to get the job if nobody is taking it seriously and professionally but I am? That was no way to come to an audition! No to mention all the talk I was listening in on about “if nothing happens by 7:30, I’m leaving”. I felt so out of place. So, I went up there and I have no idea what I said. The first thing I said was “sorry, but I’m not going to take off my clothes” and they thought it was hilarious. Hopefully, that will make them remember me and want me.

Oh. There was a guy behind me was saying how he had researched the whole Tarzan thing and it was real and he was telling the story of Tarzan, obviously flirting with some of the other girls. I was listening in, and he was retelling the Disney version of Tarzan, exactly. It was actually pretty funny.

But it felt like a joke. Like thinking you are being sent to an audition for a big production that will run for 50 performances and thousands in the audience every night, but when you get to the audition, it ends up being a small church production or a kindergarten class production for parents day. If you did end up getting the part of Tarzan or Jane, you get a small cash prize and you go to the other book signings with the author and be the characters from her book. Yeah, that would be fun, but the pay is so small, I would be spending more money to go there than I would be making money actually doing the job. It would be good improv experience. I wouldn’t mind the job, but if I don’t get it, I’ll be really angry that I actually went to the audition. Not to mention I already am.

Oh, not to mention that right before the audition, I had a iced tea from Peete’s Coffee and I didn’t realize at first, but there was caffeine in it. I’m allergic to caffeine. I was so sick for the first 3 hours of driving home. I don’t mean puking sick, but I get anxiety attacks, when I’m not anxious, for no reason, I get this thing called brain zaps, I get jittery, dizzy, my brain gets fuzzy, I can’t focus, I start talking about random things, and then change the subject. It was bad.

Over all, a bad experience. And no, if I get the job, I’m not going to say it was a good experience. The audition was a bad experience. The actual job might be a good experience.

It felt good to be in Hollywood again. I was in the same area as I was the last time I was there 2 1/2 months ago. It is all so familiar.


I treated myself to Panda Express today. And Wendy’s yesterday. And McDonalds. Yeah. I’m going running in about an hour. Just finished the last of the Panda Express. I made it last 2 meals, breakfast and lunch and a snack after work.

Semper fi.

“Looking after my health today gives me a better hope for tomorrow.” -Anne Wilson Schaef

I bought a used treadmill off of a friend. I ran 30 minutes yesterday and 35 minutes today. Man! I was sweating! Playing tennis and running is so different. Running is stamina and endurance to keep going and tennis is endurance to keep going.


There must be something wrong with the calculations on the machine, though. I ran for 35 minutes tonight. In the 35 minutes, it said I only ran 1.2 miles. That’s a 20 minute mile. I did not do a 20 minute mile. You have to be walking slower than slow to walk a 20 minute mile. Also, it said I only burned 147 calories today. Yesterday, I ran 30 minutes and burned 10 more calories than today, and I only power walked yesterday. I looked on a calorie burn calculator on a website, and it said 35 minutes of running a 10 minute mile burns 345 calories. That sounds more like it. 🙂


So, my log of exercise this week so far is:

  • Monday
  1. 30 minute power walk: 200 calories burned
  • Tuesday
  1. 1 1/2 hours of tennis: 650 calories burned
  2. 4 hours of work/walking: 720 calories burned
  3. 35 minute run: 345 calories burned

As you can tell, I burned a lot of calories today. I really hope this will help to become toned. To be toned, you need a low fat percentage. I’m one step closer than yesterday.


“Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.” -Samuel Butler

I got two checks today, and I was totally not expecting it.

While I was filming the commercial for AT&T, there were rumors that if it went SAG, the extras, who were not SAG affiliated would get SAG pay, mailed at a later date. I still am not sure what SAG is, other than a union for screen actors. So, how would I get SAG pay if I am not SAG and what does it mean for a project to go SAG?

I’m not sure if I should say the amount of pay. It’s sort of a respect thing, I guess, towards the company to not tell how much people get paid. I don’t know how to put it in words, what I’m trying to explain.


I have $100 saved from my last two paychecks from work, and now that I have this, I can help with the next 3 trips I’m taking, that I know of right now. Hopefully another will turn up. A paying acting job.

So, I have the coronation ball in 3 weeks, Jordan’s graduation a month after, and the actual pageant in January.

So a workout update. Not so good. I was told Wednesday I am still in it. Thursday, I had played tennis for 2 hours, Friday I played tennis for 1 hour with my friend at the park 1/2 a mile away. And today, I have done nothing. Since my sister is at work, I can a workout DVD and some extra crunches or something. To most people, this is already more than what most people do, but I want to workout 2-4 hours a day. I just find that doing reps is so boring! I tried. I honestly tried. I just got so bored, I ended up just lying on my floor, and I was still more entertained than than doing reps.


A diet update. I am eating less in a meal, but so much more snacking is going on! It’s all relatively healthy, though. Hard boiled eggs, red bell pepper, cottage cheese, Yoplait yogurt (even though this is the unhealthiest brand there is), pineapple, ground beef, and apple sauce. As for starch carbs, I’m trying to stay away from it. I did, however, have some sugary cereal today, without milk. I had two servings, and the box says 3/4th of a sup is one serving with 27g of carbs. I’ve already had 4 hard boiled eggs today, 3 servings to cottage cheese, 2 servings of ground beef, plus all the other stuff on the list above, and I still want to eat!


There are certain things that I believe there should be no limit on how much you can have. Not necessarily how much at once because you still need a limit on that, but over all in a day how much you want, you can have. However, the list is kind of short. Lean meats of all kind, tuna, and non-starchy veggies. I think everything else needs a limit, and a small one at that. Bread, also known as starch or carbs, is just a complex sugar. When your body breaks it down, it is sugar. Sugar is not the best for your body, but it is needed to run everyday. You can get sugar from other sources than just breads, like fruit and starchy veggies. Meat does not contain sugar. It is pure protein. Fruit should have a limit because it has so much sugar. Same with starchy veggies, like peas and potatoes. Nuts are great, but because of the fat content, it does have a limit. If there wasn’t, I could seriously eat a family size bag of chips bag size of almonds and walnuts and cashews. Especially the smokehouse flavored. And then I would roll over and die from a heart attack from all that fat. Lol. Smokehouse flavored almonds will be the death of me if I were to be released in a factory that made them and was let loose. This is just my opinion of food based on my experience. It might not be the right ratio or scale to you.

I think that’s all I have for now. 🙂

Semper Fi.

“To enjoy the glow of good health, you must exercise.” -Gene Tunney

So, apparently, I was never dropped from the pageant, and I am still doing it. We had sent multiple messages to the director, but went unanswered. My mom messaged her today and she called us. We finally have dates for the ball and the actual pageant.

It’s weird. I’m not happy, but also not sad or disappointed that I’m still doing it. I was so in the mindset that I wasn’t in it and I didn’t have to worry about it. I didn’t have to worry about gas or my out of shape body in a bikini or a dress or anything. Just whatever video auditions that popped up. Just taking 5 minutes to memorize the script and forget it after I turn off the camera.

Now, I have 33 days to get in shape. I don’t know if I mentioned this earlier, but at the photo shoot, I was the fattest girl there. No joke. No lie. Not exaggerating. All the girls there were thinner and skinnier than I am. I am average size. That’s the thing. I know people are going to say “don’t worry about it” and “the judges will see you for who you are and not what you look like”. Really? They can see my personality while I’m wearing a nearly see-through white bikini from 20 feet away? Interesting.


I just don’t know how to feel. I’m actually really nervous. I realized this past summer, I get anxiety attacks. During The Sound of Music, I had 4 and nearly passed out for one of them, and that was during a dress rehearsal. Not even an audience in the house. I managed the other 3, during performances, and somehow didn’t pass out. But I was scared, before going on every time for 4 scenes in 8 performances, that I was going to have an attack that I nearly had one a few times. About 20 minutes after I was told I am still in it, it hit me and I was dizzy for the next 30 minutes. I just ignored it, but that doesn’t make it go away.

Imagine that. After performing for 8 years on stage in band and musical theater, I start getting stage fright. Doesn’t make sense.


Well, lets see if I can get a bikini body in 30 days. Probably not, but I have to try.


We’ve received 3 letters from my brother who is in boot camp or the marines. I’m really proud of him but I really miss him.


Semper Fi.